I was recently on a panel and asked many questions about my experiences as a small-town rural church (STRC) Pastor. Two questions seemed to rise above the others, and I want to address these questions in this post in hope that they will encourage other brother-pastors in similar situations.

The first question is, what did you enjoy the most about STRC ministry? There are at least two joys to share.

I enjoyed the unique relational intimacy with church members and the community. Everybody knew everybody, and that was both a blessing and a curse, but mostly a blessing. The church service almost always carried over into a local eatery or a church member’s home. My best memories with members occurred over a great meal or sitting on the back porch drinking tea. These are the people I loved, pastored, and preached to each week. I knew the names of their kids and the complex issues they were facing. For some, I married them, and for others, I buried their loved ones. When I stood before them each week, I was not a stranger but their Pastor. It was a grace gift from the Almighty to shepherd them.

I loved preaching to the people I pastored so intimately. As I prepared a message, names, and faces came to mind, and community blessings and tragedies were near my heart. Even illustrations regarding members gone on into heaven, local histories, and regional landmarks knit their way into the message.

The second question that stood out to me on the panel is, what would you do differently if you could do it all over again? I have much to share on this, but I will limit it to three things.

First, I would have clarified (in my theology) the definition of ministry success in STRC much sooner. For a time, I was consumed with growing the church spiritually and numerically and often not content with discipling those in front of me. I later learned that faithfulness that leads to fruitfulness is the metric of success. I confess I was trying to make the church into something it would not be; a large suburban church.

Second, I would do less event programming and focus more on relational discipleship, developing small groups, and nurturing/mentoring leaders. Too often, I tried to do too much on my own and, at times, put my family and church under undue stress during certain seasons. As I think back, I would have engaged members more relationally and intentionally to help them grow as disciples of Jesus. In particular, I would have spent more time developing those who could help me carry out the vision and mission of the church instead of going it alone so much.

Third, I would have created and developed a Men’s Discipleship Ministry. I believe that if there is one thing that works well in STRC ministry, it is reaching and ministering to men. It is hard to explain, but STR men really enjoy connecting over a fire, bbq, cornhole, skeet shooting, or any number of hobbies. In my experience, they will make time for church or community gatherings, which seems to be in their DNA. Pastors have a unique role in initiating such ministry and outreach. There are fertile fields and spiritual fruit ripe for picking in this area of STRC.

Resources

Liberating Ministry from the Success Syndrome by Kent Hughes

Noble Warriors Ministry (These guys helped me develop a biblical and strategic plan to reach men.)

Mobilizing Men for One-on-One Ministry by Steve Sonderman

How to Build a Life-Changing Men’s Ministry by Steve Sonderman

The Mentoring Church: How Pastors and Congregations Cultivate Leaders by Phil A. Newton